Are you a horseaholic - the kind of horse lover that makes horses a lifestyle, not just a hobby?
You know what I mean. First you were the horse lover. Then you became the horse rider. Maybe then you turned into a horse keeper - who then ended up living, breathing, smelling, being (well, especially during shedding season) horses. The official recognition of "horseaholic" requires many achievements beyond just loving horses and thinking they're cute. You have to earn your way into that elite category!
Take a look at the following questions and see how many apply to you!
1. Do you apply almost every concept to something about horses?
It can be anything and everything and doesn't need to have any resemblance to horses - but you'll find a way! Figure skating informs your understanding about core and balance - which of course, you need to be able to ride well. Music must be analyzed to decide if it would match a walk, trot or canter rhythm. "Soft eyes" can help you not only in the riding ring, but out on the road as well, as you change lanes and maneuver between vehicles.
2. Do you notice how so many ladies' tall boots are riding boot imitations?
You find it alternately pleasing and irritating that the new "tall boot" fashion boots look like riding boots. On the one hand, you love the decorative hardware and straight-bottomed heel (in case you ever want to wear that boot to actually ride). On the other hand, it displeases you that almost everybody is wearing some version of your show riding boot - and not riding at all!
3. Does your Facebook page have more horsey pics than human pics?
This is a key indicator of your horseaholic-ness. Take a small unbiased survey of your recent timeline. How many of your posts have something in them about horses or riding? Do you share hilarious horsey memes more often than not? Are your friends and otherwise non-horsey humans relegated to only the odd post and picture?
4. Without thinking about it, do you move people around with the same body language that you use to move horses around?
Hey, it works! It's easy, effective, efficient and best of all, no one knows you're doing it!
5. Do you mistakenly cluck at people (and then look away and pretend the sound came from somewhere else)?
This one can be a bit embarrassing but the real truth is that you don't do it on purpose. It's like your clucking machine just takes over and you've clucked before you even knew you were doing it.
6. Do you have to actually think about not calling "door" when entering... your office?
This one takes quite a bit of effort, especially if you are at a barn that requires you to use your voice at every entrance and exit. Once you get into the swing of it, you might find it very difficult to hold back at any doorway. Which then can lead to interesting and confused glances in your direction.
7. Have you become picky about the amount of "denier" and "fill" you want for your horse's blankets?
You have become quite the expert at identifying quality of horse blanket fabric and you know exactly how much thickness your horse needs for which weather conditions.
8. Do you pre-book tickets to the horsey event of the year - and invariably, max out on the group size limit (so some of your barn friends end up being left out)?
It happens every year but you're bound and determined to get that row of tickets no matter what happens! You'll stay up late or get up early so you can be one of the first to get on that ticket selling website.
9. Can you throw around the terms "aught", "1 degree", "contracted" and "laminae" with the best of them - and actually know what you're talking about?
There's nothing like being a lifelong learner, and knowing all about your horse's feet fits the description perfectly. No hoof, no horse, as they say - and so you learn everything there is about hoof physiology, mechanics and maintenance. Plus you know quite well that your farrier really is your horse's best friend.
10. Do you get irritated when your well-meaning non-horsey friends post a horse pic on your Timeline - the one you already saw months ago and decided NOT to share?
Well, honestly, it's because you've seen them all, as soon as they came out. So if you didn't share it, it wasn't worthy!
So how did it go? Are you a full-on horseaholic, or just a wannabe? What else can you think of that qualifies you for this esteemed horsey position? Comment below!
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